Getting the homecoming call thrills the entire house...
Watching the plane land makes the families giddy with excitement...
Catching the first glimpse of him exiting the plane (last, of course) results in us all jumping with joy...
Stealing the first kiss brings comfort that he's safe...
Remembering how to be a family again...well, that takes work...
The days following a deployment...
A compassionate wife would wonder...
What's it like for him to leave his family, step into a world completely foreign to most people, do a job that you can't speak of, and then listen to others--who haven't been--share their opinions on what you're doing?
What's it like to have an aerial view in an arena that most of us don't understand?
What's it like to only know your part (your view through a soda straw) of the military puzzle and rely on the intel of others to inform you about the rest of the picture?
What's it like for him to do what he does?
A gracious wife might ask...
How do you prepare answers to the questions people ask about our role "over there" when you DO have a deep, gut opinion about the whole situation overseas, but you have to be careful in your speech---oh-so-careful about what you say...
A kind wife wouldn't ask questions that she knows you can't answer...
And she certainly wouldn't get irritated when you choose not to answer...
She would know the protocol by now...
She would understand...
A patient wife might ask him...
How do you make the switch from a combat mind-set to a family mind-set on the couple day plane trip home?
One day you are on 24 hour alert...
The next day you can let down your guard and sleep sound...
Over there people looked to you for leadership...
Over here you are trying to figure out how to lead a family that has led itself for the past couple months...
A loving wife would want to know...
How do you feel as the plane bringing you home makes it's final descent to your home base?
What are you thinking the moment you see your family waving the welcome signs anxious for your return?
What's it like to step back into your home for the first time after a deployment?
How excited are you to re-engage your kids?
How ready are you to reconnect with your wife?
How nervous are you to work your way back into a family that found a new way to function while you were gone?
What's that like?
A Proverbs 31 wife would take a deep breath, hold her tongue, and come along side her husband as he resumes his role...
I am that wife only on paper...
In real life, I'm too busy trying to make him understand what it's like to be the one on the ground holding the sign...
I love the idea of my family being back together...
I anticipated February 24th for two months...
But, putting our family back together takes time...and grace...and patience...and gentleness...and love...and the power of God...and more grace...
If I could just take this martyr hat off for a moment, I might fully enjoy not being in charge...
The wife I want to be would have already thrown away the "Welcome Home" signs and fully welcomed her husband back into the family...
But, for some reason, I'm still trying to let him know what it's like to be the ones at home...
The ones holding the signs...
It's been ten days...
It's time to throw away the signs...
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